Mar
16

See Kids Dream

By Kelsey

One of the main things – and perhaps the most important – I hope to instill in my daughter is caring for her fellow man regardless of geographic location, ideology, orientation, creed, or color. There are a lot of organizations that accept donations and do amazing things with them. But there are few that truly empower kids as givers and show them how important it is to be part of a community of caring.

That’s why I’m giving $10 to See Kids Dream based in Columbus, Ohio, as part of my #ten4tues project. Join me if you want!

See Kids Dream Mission Statement

See Kids Dream is a charitable organization with a core purpose of empowering children to connect communities. The programs we offer engage children of all ages, abilities, socioeconomic status, ethnicity and cultural backgrounds in ways which help them to achieve their fullest individual potential. They foster connections and enhance community resources by cultivating the creativity, leadership and the natural desire of children to provide benefit to others and their communities at large.

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Mar
16

Nothing Personal

By Kelsey

NOTHING P€R$ONALI share so much of me here and elsewhere, but for the past two years I’ve been sitting on something that is deeply personal.

A few months ago I tweeted: “Someday I’ll write about this.”

That day has come.

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Mar
15

Cat Crap Fever

By Kelsey

Not sure if you know this or not, but we live in a world where cats crap in toilets.

You doubt this?

Allow me to introduce you to the Litter Kwitter. It’s a potty training system for your cat, of course.

I’m always amazed at the dumb marketing copy that companies think up. The Litter Kwitter folks say that they’re product “improves people’s lives.” If the presence of a litter box is disturbing the quality of your life, I feel really sorry for you.

They also claim that the Litter Kwitter system is “award winning,” as if there actually is an award for cat pooping systems.

I’m not the chief poop scooper in our house, but I would sooner take on the responsibility than allow the introduction of the Litter Kwitter. Oreo already slaps me in the face, looks down at me from literal and figurative high places, and continually finds ways to stick her butt in my face. But no matter what she does or how she treats me, I can look at her and say, “Look, you poop in a tiny little box of sand. Don’t feel too good about yourself.”

The Litter Kwitter is nothing but a kitty conspiracy to rob men of their thrones. I imagine walking into the bathroom with my reading material and, while I’m about to drop trowel, Oreo jumping onto the toilet seat and giving me a “seat’s taken, stupid biped” look.

The Litter Kwitter people must be stopped! If we don’t stand up against this now, sitting down on our thrones may never be the same.

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Mar
13

Midwest writers unite!

By Kelsey

I’m speaking at the Midwest Writers mini-conference today. The organizers originally expected around 25-30 attendees, but 100+ signed up. Why so many more? Annie asked if it had anything to do with me. (That was nice of her.)  But I’m sure it doesn’t.  You give a free writing conference and supply it with donuts and they will come.

Since there are so many attendees, I decided to forgo the killing of trees and just share my bits of wisdom here:

A kick in the pants
On editors
Exploiting aspiring writers
Getting an agent
Blogging build a writing career

Books I recommend-

ON WRITING

On Writing Well

Self-editing for Fiction Writers

ON GETTING PAID TO WRITE

Write the perfect book proposal: 10 that sold

How to Write a book proposal

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Mar
11

The Most Interesting Man in the World is Interesting

By Kelsey

Jonathan Goldsmith, the actor who plays the Most Interesting Man in the World in the Dos Equis commercials, loves Mexico.

On a recent flight on Frontier Airlines I read his “10 reasons I love Mexico” in the on-flight magazine Wild Blue Yonder. At the end of the list the editors added a short bio:

Turns out the veteran actor, who had roles on TV shows like Dallas and Dynasty–plus dozens more–may actually be just a bit more interesting than his commercial creation. Mr. Goldsmith’s next adventure is aboard his 47–foot sloop, which he plans to sail down to the Sea of Cortez to retrace John Steinbeck’s research journey in 1940.

It seems that Goldsmith just might suffer from The Most Interesting Man in the World Syndrome named after the character he brought to life. Sad irony.

The thing is, Goldsmith’s 10 favorite things about Mexico aren’t all that interesting. He loves the beach, people, mountains, etc. Boring! I thought I would rewrite them for him still using his “likes” but spicing things up a bit.

10 Reasons the Most Interesting Man in the World loves Mexico

1. I love the people.

The women want me and the men want to be me.

2. And SCUBA diving as well

I once taught a school of hammerhead how to hunt.

3. I adore the food

If you are what you eat, I’m a hot tamale and I’ll kick your ass and make your eyes water.

4. The Water

Sometimes I walk on it.

5. The Fishing is Wonderful

I pluck my chest hairs, weave them together to make the strongest fishing line known to man. I once caught a great white shark using my chest hair line. It only took 15 minutes to get the shark to the boat. By then my chest hair had grown back.

6. The Sun is Superb

I have no tan lines. In fact, I don’t tan at all. My natural color is dark and mysterious.

Also, my head of hair is so lush that it converts sunlight into oxygen via photosynthesis.

7. The Women are Voluptuous

The Most Interesting Man in the World doesn’t kiss and tell…oh wait…I do. The women break like so many waves upon my sandy shore before fading back to sea out of energy and satisfied that they reached the destination they longed for their entire lives.

8. I also like Copper Canyon

The copper tastes good and the canyon is fun to jump across.

9. And the Mountains

I once shed a tear in the mountains when I saw my amazingly handsome reflection in a stream. The tear landed on the dry ground and a palm tree sprouted. The tree was cut down and sold on eBay for $100,000. A jewelry box was carved from the tree and sold by Lloyd’s of London for $10,000,000. If you think about it, I could raise enough money to end world hunger with a few good tears. Too bad I have nothing to cry about.

10. And the baroness and exquisite loneliness of Baja California

If I don’t spend some alone time with my thoughts, they get jealous. So does the Baroness.

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Mar
10

Free Money update…

By Kelsey

Wow! This week’s #ten4tues has been amazing.

Who knew that offering free money would introduce me to so many worthy causes supported by new friends and old? This is definitely something I’ll replicate in the future.

The tough part was choosing who to give the money to. Here were my top selections:

1)Kristi Scott is going to Trujillo, Peru to work at an orphanage. She writes that “the orphanage houses about 40 Peruvian children from various backgrounds including abuse, neglect, and extreme poverty.”

My thoughts: I spent a week at an orphanage in Guatemala and the experience has never left me. Giving to Kristi is a two-birds-with-one-stone kind of thing. It exposes orphans to a talented and passionate young woman. And it exposes a talented and passionate young woman to an experience that will likely shape the rest of her life.

2) Michelle wants me to give her $10 bucks so she can take it to the Fallston Animal Rescue Movement. Michelle writes, “They rescue dogs that have to be put down at other shelters because they need to be nursed back to health or need some behavioral training. The dogs stay with foster families until they are well, and then they are adopted out. There are 15 people involved (not counting the foster families), and they are all volunteers. Their main cost is vet bills; last year’s total was $80,000.”

My thoughts: I was raised by dogs. Sort of. And while I call myself a dog lover, I don’t really do enough to support less fortunate ones. I follow @aplacetobark on Twitter and that’s about it. Giving ten bucks to Michelle would allow her to support a cause that should be more important to me. Also, it’s my understanding that the family that runs the shelter makes up gaps in funding out of their own pocket. That’s passion that deserves support.

3. Virginia, a superhero librarian, wrote, “ $10 will purchase two books to give to high school ninth graders who may have never owned a book before–the program, started by our Friends of the Library group is popular with the kids, many who haven’t come to the library before–but soon realize we are here to help–we have free materials they can borrow–and there are computers!”

My thoughts: Where would I be without books and without libraries. I’ve written about this before. I’ve had the pleasure of visiting multiple libraries around the country since my book came out, and I’m a huge fan. The experience has completely changed the way I see librarians. They are lovers of knowledge and a great resource, but they are also quasi-social workers at the front lines of fighting poverty through education and literacy (including computer literacy).

4. James is going back to Liberia where he’ll assist at a medical clinic and more importantly return as a reinvigorated supporter of the Liberan people’s recovery from a decade long civil war.

My thoughts: James is a great guy that I’ve gotten to know over the last year. He gives to the Muncie community in so many important ways. A few hours ago, we were at lunch discussing our upcoming trips to Africa and I could hear how important this trip was to James.

All of these projects are worthy of my $10. I hope that someone will step forward after reading the above and give to them. If you do, please report back. Unfortunately I can barely afford to give $10 to one group per week. I believe someone once said, “I only regret that I have but one $10 bill to give …”

That said, I chose James for the following reasons: his Facebook post inspired the “Free Money” idea and I could take a photo of him with my $10.

I hope to support the other individuals in upcoming Tuesdays and shine more light on the great work they are doing.

James

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Mar
9

Free Money! I want to give you $10

By Kelsey

Seriously.

Tell me why you need $10 and if I think you’re worthy, I’ll send it to you.  Why? Because it’s Tuesday and every Tuesday this year I’m giving $10 to a worthy cause as part of my #ten4tues project.

Maybe you have a charity that you want to pass the $10 onto. Maybe you want to take your grandma for a cheeseburger.  Maybe you’re saving for a trip to Africa. Maybe you’re my wife and think I shouldn’t just give money to some random person. Whatever the reason, let me know via email kelsey@kelseytimmerman.com, in this comment thread, on Facebook, or on Twitter (@kelseytimmerman).

It’s all about the Alexanders, Baby…

IMG_0451

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Mar
8

Meet iPhone Girl

By Kelsey

Do consumers care about the people making our stuff?

Yes.

Don’t believe me; meet iPhone girl…

In 2008 a British man fired up his new iPhone and discovered photos of a worker at the Chinese factory where his phone was made. He posted the photos on macrumors and in a matter of weeks the ensuing comment thread had nearly 700 comments and people all over the world were asking, “Who is iPhone Girl?”

iPhone girl became a sensation. Her smiling face was on cNET , on MSNBC, and in the Washington Post.

They tracked iPhone girl to a factory in Shenzhen where a company spokesperson called the incident a “beautiful mistake.” And it was for Apple. They had been blasted in the press for the conditions in which the iPhones were made and here was a pretty, happy worker in a neat and clean factory.

iPhone girl was reportedly stalked by paparazzi and eventually the South China Morning Post reported, “She’s just a young girl who has come to the city from her remote hometown. She’s never been in such a situation. She’s really scared by the media. She told me she wanted to quit her job and go back home to get away from this. We let her off work today so she could rest.”

iPhone Girl just wanted to make iPhones in peace. I’m not sure if I believe that. You have to take what you read in Chinese newspapers with a healthy grain of salt. But something beautiful did happen.

When we are reminded that actual people make the stuff we buy and that these people have slightly crooked smiles and slightly crooked caps and that they are bursting with personality and somewhere they have a family. We connect with them.

iPhone girl reminds us that we give a darn and that there is an iPad Girl, a GAP jeans Girl, a Stapler Girl, and so on.

I think all of our things should come with photos of the people who made them and perhaps a little story about their life.

An iPhone captured this young worker’s smile. And her smile captured our hearts. It was a beautiful mistake, indeed.

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Mar
5

Africa calls

By Kelsey

“You can leave Africa, but Africa won’t leave you.”

That’s what the high-powered executive told me after I mentioned my upcoming trip to Kenya. He spent three years in Africa teaching English when he was in his early twenties. He never said what it was about Africa that makes it not leave you, but I expect he might not know.

That was on Wednesday night.

Today I saw a friend’s Facebook post that Africa was calling him to return, Liberia specifically.

I’ve visited sunny beaches and shantytowns around the world and, I must admit, it’s the beaches that tend to call for my return. (Oh Na Pali coast of Kauai, how I long for you!) Sure, I’ll never forget the dump I visited in Cambodia, but I have no desire to return.

While in Bangladesh, Bibi Russell — fashion model/designer/UN Envoy/living saint — told me that “Beauty lies in Poverty,” forever changing the way I saw the world and leading to this paragraph in Where Am I Wearing:

Mother and daughter (Bangladesh)The world we come from seems to be less real in comparison to Bangladesh . A child’s laugh when surrounded by our modern luxuries isn’t as beautiful as Arifa’s daughter’s on a sultry day where hunger wakes her before the heat. A mother’s smile while chopping veggies on the floor seems more genuine than an American mother’s while dishing out mac ’n cheese onto an Elmo plate. Nothing—a smile, a laugh, not even a single pair of underwear—is taken for granted.

Beaches can be beautiful, but so can people. Is this what calls for the executive and my friend to return?

I’ll be spending much of my time in the slums of Kibera. Here’s a video to give you an idea what it’s like.

There are flying toilets! This video hits you hard enough without the smell, and from the looks of things the smell must really be something. Does this look like a place that you would want to visit once, let alone return to again and again?

When I leave Africa, will Africa NOT leave me?

I’ll find out in 50 days.

If you’re interested in joining the cause and getting your name in the credits in a documentary about Kibera visit www.heldhostagebyapathy.com.

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Mar
2

Chile Earthquate: The #ten4tues Project

By Kelsey

Okay, since I started #ten4tues we’ve had more than enough earthquakes. I think we’ve more than met our quota for the year, so let’s stop having them.

That said, this week I’m supporting the relief efforts in Chile by donating $10 to the World Vision Project. I hope you’ll join me.

I know that some folks are hesitant to donate to faith-based groups and I understand and respect that. Missionaries haven’t always had the best reputation through the years. At their worst they are culture-killers that offer a message along the lines of “our God provides us with food. Worship Him and you won’t go hungry.” At their best, which is where I believe so many have evolved to today, they serve their fellow man. They don’t reach out with an agenda. They reach out with compassion.

When it comes to any NGO, faith-based or not, there are few that can touch the reach of World Vision. In a recent column Nicholas Kristof of the New York Times put the size of the group in perspective:

World Vision now has 40,000 staff members in nearly 100 countries. That’s more staff members than CARE, Save the Children and the worldwide operations of the United States Agency for International Development — combined.

I’ve seen them on the ground in Cambodia doing great work and I’m sure they’ll be doing the same in Chile.

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All Rights Reserved.
Contact Kelsey hi@kelseytimmerman.com

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